Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
