So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I am available for nakedness
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
