is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize
