oh god the rape fog is back!
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Randomize
