Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Randomize
