I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
