I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
