who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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