just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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