we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize