ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
