what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize
