i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Randomize
