S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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