what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
