wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
