ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
