Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
We were destined to go to rehab together
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
