sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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