yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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