Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
