Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
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