yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
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