All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
