Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
