I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Randomize