At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
