I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
