The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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