listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
