I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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