Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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