Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
