I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize