he shaved USA in his pubs
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
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