It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
