I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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