I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Randomize
