She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
