Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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