Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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