I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize