mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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