Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
