Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Randomize