How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
my mouth tastes like poor choices
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
