what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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