Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
