I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
