pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
false alarm. still invincible.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Randomize
