it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
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